Creepy Crawlies

There are lots of stuff in this world that gives me the heebie-jeebies....weird bugs that fly/jump, the sound of cardboard rubbing together, couples where the man is so old you don't if they're bf/gf or father/daughter.

But the kicker of all kickers is probably children singing. Before any parents want to go buck wild on me, I don't mean the cute kind you're four year old does for the Christmas play. I mean the ridiculous, sequined costumed, Star Search version where you can tell the parents are praying to everything holy their kid is gonna be the next Brittney Spears.

The kind with the overly expressive toddlers and preteens attempt to wow us with their jazz-hands and helmet-hair. Seriously people, your kid's not a cash cow. And if you really wanted your kid to be a Brittney Spears, maybe you should pick up an Us Weekly once in a while. You might change your mind.

What brought this all on you might ask? I was channel flipping recently and came across a Full House episode with this big talent show at the end. Right in between Stephanie screwing up big time, and learning a lesson from Uncle Jesse there was this downright obnoxious duet of two kids singing "Don't Go Breaking My Heart." (duet's multiply the ick-factor ten fold for obvious reasons: They're usually singing about love-- and they're kids, the inappropriate looks they share, the almost PG-13 dance move, etc. Grrr)

I'll survive though, cause at least I can turn the channel. There's no remote to remove the Praying Mantis thats been camping out on my door for three days.

Nothing good happens after 2AM...

Lifetime has been airing How I Met Your Mother repeats and I am re-loving them as much as ever. When they fist started the would come on at like 7pm, now they are on at like 2am. Oops, I guess everyone isn't loving them as much as I am.

I record all of them. I do the same with The Office, Sex and the City, and Scrubs reruns. Sometimes I watch them, sometimes I automatically delete them, but I'm always glad to have them on a rainy afternoon like today.

Speaking of late night TV I also watch Chelsea Lately, a lot. And it's much more fun to watch the airings that come on at 3am, because they run some of the best commercials. You know the ones for party-lines, work out videos, and other really weird shit you think no one would ever buy. (That's probably how the snuggie started out.)

But yeah, with all the fun stuff to DVR in the wee hours, it seems that lots of good things happen after 2am. And none of it involves puking in the breezeway of my building, well not for me at least.

Oh, and if you search the quote from my last post, my blog comes up on Google. Go ahead and try it, it's pretty badass.

The big spoon or the little spoon?

"As a country why can't we come up with something better than spooning."
--Andrew The Real World DC

I for one will politely disagree. Spooning is amazing. Spooning is warm, comfortable, safe, and relaxing. When I was in high school I would've traded a few lusty romps with my boyfriend for the chance to spend one night snuggling. It seems as we get older and actually have plenty of chances for a good cuddle we can forget how nice it really is. There's just something about falling asleep with someone and knowing they'll be there when you wake up. It's so peaceful, plus it helps keep you warm on a chilly night.

I'm not suggesting that I'd ever give up forking; I'm just saying, to quote Ferris Bueller, "Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you might miss it." And spooning is one really nice way to slow things down.

It's always more fun to share with everyone.

I am super not happy today, and I'm not sure I can put it into words so bear with me for a second. I get really angry, probably too angry, at stupid people. This afternoon my patience was tested, and to my own surprise I was able to keep my big mouth shut, kinda.

I was having a conversation about how an acquaintance of mine had questioned why we're giving money to Haiti considering we are in a recession. She then went on to compare the earthquake to Katrina. Someone who overheard this conversation began going off on Katrina victims. Talking about how they didn't deserve any assistance because they chose to live in the area, didn't have jobs, and were probably stupid. Seriously, that's what she said. She went on to compare this catastrophic natural disaster to people being snowed into they're homes. Seriously, that's what she said. (FYI this is NOT an ok way to think.)

As I listened to her speak, believe me I was angry. But after I took about fifty deep breaths I eventually felt sorry for her. Sad that she is so spoiled in her cushy life, so removed from suffering that she is completely unable to feel even the slightest drop of empathy for others. And I felt thankful that for whatever reason I have not become that jaded, self-righteous, or complacent.

Somehow I resisted every urge to scream at her, throw up in her face, and shake her like crazy. All I said was, "I just think no matter how people got into a mess, when other people need help which should just help and not ask questions." I was exceedingly proud of myself for remaining calm because really I knew there was no point. I wasn't going to change her mind, in the same way she'd never change mine.

To summarize I'd say when people who have the same hearts you do, same dreams you do, love their family the same way you love yours are suffering here's what you do: don't be douche-bag. Give them something, show them compassion, and thank God for how amazing you have it.

Vent for the day complete. :)

"If you've got one sandwich, cut that thing in half.
If you know a secret joke, tell it and share a laugh."

--The Sharing Song: Jack Johnson

Give a little

Hey girl, Magenta

"Life is like a box of crayons. Most people are the 8-color boxes, but what you're really looking for are the 64-color boxes with the sharpeners on the back. I fancy myself to be a 64-color box, though I've got a few missing. It's ok though, because I've got some more vibrant colors like periwinkle at my disposal. I have a bit of a problem though in that I can only meet the 8-color boxes. Does anyone else have that problem? I mean there are so many different colors of life, of feeling, of articulation.. so when I meet someone who's an 8-color type.. I'm like, "hey girl, magenta!" and she's like, "oh, you mean purple!" and she goes off on her purple thing, and I'm like, "no - I want magenta!"" (John Mayer)


I wrote about this quote a while back, and was revisiting this idea the other day. There's two new thoughts that began churning in my head.

1. I believe myself to be 64 color box, but the newsflash is it's much more relative than I'd prefer to acknowledge. Because afterall labels (even cute crayola colors like macaroni and cheese) are rarely definitive. My purple is very well another girl's magenta. I always joke that every relationship has a "smart one" and a "cute one." So maybe every relationship has a "purple" and a "magenta"??? I still want magenta so maybe I'll have to be comfortable being someone's purple....I'm usually pretty happy being the cute one so it's not too far of a jump. ;)

2. The real kick in the teeth is once you have magenta you're fucking screwed for life. I was lucky enough to get one at the infant stages of my dating career, and I've had a couple since. It makes dating easy and extremely difficult at the same time. On the one hand I can very easily identify the purples and move on. On the other hand it hard-core spoiled my ass. I compare it to DVR . Now that I can watch the Golden Globes and skip the boring categories, commercials, and speeches by people I care nothing about why would I ever want to watch it in real time ever again??

Sidenote: Yay for Glee and Madmen two of my favorites for winning their categories at the Golden Globes last night!

Did you swallow an amplifier?

Officially blogging on a official blogging site doesn't make me feel very official at all. It makes me feel uneasy. But it does make me feel opened, too. Even if no one is reading I feel like someone COULD read it, and that's all that matters. Please exercise patience with my inexperience, spelling, and grammer; in return I'll promise to try and be as un-boring as possible.

So in my first post, I'll start with familiar ground: music I'm obsessing over. This morning (and for probably the next month or 10) it is The Avett Brothers. All I can say is if you like real music, give them a chance. They'll probably earn you bonus points if like bluegrass or similar type stuff. What's not to love banjo, stand up bass, and warm melodies...throw in a scruffy beard or two, and you know I'm crazy-hooked.

Check out this video, and get back to me. It's the best live version I found of "Laundry Room" with some other stuff on the end. You are under direct order to get through at least the first song, but I suggest you do yourself a favor and watch the whole thing. It WILL make you day.




(and PS I will probably be moving some old myspace blogs over here, feel free to ignore them or read them and pretend they're intersting.)